The people of the Republic of Cuba heartily applaud the decision of Orlando "Tubby" Smith to leave the University of Kentucky in favor of the University of Minnesota. Cuba believes not only that the state of Minnesota is more fully in line with socialist principles of governance than Kentucky, but also that the proletariat of Minnesota is more likely to fully appreciate the contribution of Orlando "Tubby" Smith than that of Kentucky.
The Foreign Ministry had no official comment on the victory of the bourgeois "Kansas Jayhawks" over the proletarian "Southern Illinois Salukis".
